<![CDATA[John Braland - Leaders]]>Tue, 30 Jun 2026 00:57:05 -0500Weebly<![CDATA[Do You Want to Have Deeper Conversations?]]>Wed, 24 Oct 2018 05:00:00 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/do-you-want-to-have-deeper-conversations​You want to be heard, I want to be heard, everyone wants to be heard. When we are heard we feel connected and valued. Unfortunately, most people talk quite a bit, but are heard very little. That could explain why feel so disconnected to others even if we talk to each other on a regular basis. According to statistics:
 
  • Most people spend between 70 and 80% of their day engaged in some form of communication. About 55% of their time is devoted to listening.
  • The average person hears between 20,000 and 30,000 words during the course of a 24-hour period.
  • Although we hear 20,000-30,000 words, our brain can only remember about 17-25% of the things we listen to.
  • Your words only convey about 7% of what you’re trying to say. The other 93% is communicated through facial expressions and the tone of your voice.
  • Recent research reveals that men only use half their brain to listen while women engage both lobes. Maybe women are better listeners after all! (https://www.creditdonkey.com/listening-statistics.html, accessed 10/16/2018)  
 
The question is, how can a person have deeper conversations? The key is to learn how to listen so that the person who is communicating feels heard and understood. Here are nine insights that will help you to have deeper conversations if you practice them. 
 
1. Listen with intention. The key to effective listening is to listen intently. Simply put, pay attention to the person who is communicating with you.
 
2. Be fully present in the conversation. Don’t try to listen to the person and the television, surf the web, or play video games. Don’t listen and answer emails or try to text and connect. It just doesn’t work and you will irritate the person communicating.    
 
3. Ask insightful questions. If you are paying attention, you will be able to ask pertinent questions that will broaden your understanding of what is being communicated.   
 
4. Ask clarifying questions if you don’t understand. If the story or information doesn’t make sense, ask clarifying questions. This shows you want to learn and are interested in collecting all the information accurately.  
 
5. Give conversations time. Don’t rush the person who is talking. People are always in a hurry, but you cannot rush deep and meaningful conversations. If you don’t have time to get into a deep conversation at the moment, ask to get together again at a better time when you can be fully present and engaged. 
 
6. Be aware of your nonverbal listening postures. Folded arms give the vibe that you are angry or close minded. Holding your groin indicates you feel insecure. When listening, pay attention to all of your facial expressions, body postures, and hand motions. You can inadvertently look bored and come across uncaring just by looking at your watch. Allow your whole body to engage in the conversation. This is done by facing the person talking, putting your hands in a natural position, and keeping your legs on the floor.        
 
7. Make eye contact. When you make eye contact with a person it tells them that they have your full attention. Make eye contact often. 
 
8. Minimize distractions. If the T.V. is on in the background, loud music is playing, or if you are fidgeting with your cell phone, it will be hard to hear the other person. Your attention will be divided and you will only heard a small portion of the message being communicated.
 
9. Repeat back the information you heard to make sure it is accurate. This is an old trick I teach in premarriage class. Once the person has finished talking, repeat the highlights of what they said back in a summary form. This will help them to know you connected with them. If they need to clarify some of the details after your recap, they will have the chance.
 
Everyone can become a better listener by applying these nine insights to their conversations. In doing so, you will take your communication to the next level with others. They will feel heard and understood, isn’t that something we all really want? 
]]><![CDATA[Resonant Leadership]]>Wed, 20 Apr 2016 16:00:01 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/resonant-leadership“Great leaders move us. They ignite our passion and inspire the best in us. When we try to explain why they are so effective, we speak of strategy, vision, or powerful ideas. But the reality is much more primal: Great leadership works through the emotions.” (Goleman, Primal Leadership, page 1)

I walked into a local retail giant the other day and noticed that the employees were all busy taking care of the tasks at hand. Most of them looked very satisfied with what they were doing and enjoyed interacting with the customers. Overall, my shopping experience was very pleasant.

A few days later I went to another retail giant. This environment was different. The employees were busy but they didn’t seem to be very engaged with their surroundings. I walked by several employees and they didn’t even notice me, let alone offer even minimal assistance. After picking up a few things, I went to the checkout. The person behind the counter scanned my items and gave me my total. There was no personal interaction or any outward display of friendliness.

An “apples to apples” comparison on paper would show that both stores sold basically the same products, had similar pricing, and similar locations, but they felt completely different. Why? I believe the answer can be traced back to leadership.

The first store I visited had "resonance", which is described in the Oxford English Dictionary as: “the reinforcement or prolongation of sound by reflection” or, more specifically, “by synchronous vibration.” (Primal Leadership, Goleman, Boyatis, McKee, page 18) This store had resonance between its employees and its customers. In other words, everyone was working together for the common good. The leadership team of this franchise understands that when the store employees are happy, when they feel like they are contributing to the company and the company is contributing to them, they will happily perform their jobs and their emotional energy will resonate with the customers, thus making their experience satisfactory.

The second store I visited reeked of dissonance. Author Goleman writes: “Dissonance, in its original musical sense, describes an unpleasant, harsh sound; in both musical and human terms, dissonance refers to a lack of harmony. Dissonant leadership produces groups that feel emotionally discordant, in which people have a sense of being continually off-key” (Primal Leadership, page 21). After a short visit to the store I could sense that the employees were generally discontent. They did not resonate with each other and certainly did not resonate with the customers. Statistics tell us that if the employees are dissonant, the leadership team is modeling it to them.

Resonant leaders are proficient in four domains. They understand the importance of each domain and are able to use them to create harmonious vibrations that ring throughout the corporation, company, or team. These are the four domains:

1. Self-awareness.    
You need to be very aware of your own emotions. What makes you happy? What makes you upset? What keeps you going? What forces you to quit. If you know what drives you, you will be better able to steer your emotions in a healthy direction.

2. Self-management   
Being self-aware also means that you understand your triggers. Once you know and understand your triggers, you are better able to maximize them or minimize them in a wide variety of settings. Instead of spontaneously lashing out at an employee who isn’t performing up to standards, you can deal with the situation and remain under control. Leaders who do not understand their own emotion are more prone to exploding at the wrong times for the wrong reasons. This creates a feeling of insecurity in the organization that is very toxic and very contagious.    

3. Social awareness
“Social awareness- particularly empathy- supports the next step in the leader’s primal task: driving resonance. By being attuned to how others feel in the moment, a leader can say and do what’s appropriate, whether that means calming fears, assuaging anger, or joining in good spirits. This attunement also lets a leader sense the shared values and priorities that can guide the group.” (Primal Leadership, page 30)    

If a leader is not socially aware, they will ring out of step with the culture and miss the emotions of the moment. Neglecting people’s feelings and perspectives will rarely resonate in a positive fashion.

4. Relational management
Once leaders grasp how they are wired, are able to harness that energy in as positive force, and understand the culture in which they are plugged into, they can channel that energy into already resonating relationships which has a ripple effect throughout the organization.  

Dissonant leaders rarely have the opportunity to practice relational management because they only know how to lead from a positional perspective. They may be effective in the short run because of their title, but they will eventually crush their subordinates.    

Great leaders are resonant leaders. Now that you understand the difference, apply these principles to your ministry and be the leader God has called you to be.   

Reflection Questions:  
  1. How do resonance and dissonance impact ministry?
  2. Would you describe your team as one that exhibits resonance or dissonance? Explain why.
  3. What factors play into your description?
]]><![CDATA[Rise Up]]>Mon, 23 Nov 2015 02:13:17 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/rise-upI believe that a church will never grow beyond the spiritual capacity of its leadership. This is why leaders must passionately pursue their relationship with Jesus Christ. This must be done with attention and authenticity. The best way to take a spiritual snapshot of your life is to ask yourself several introspective questions. When leaders examine their spiritual lives it ensures authenticity and positions them to pursue passionate spirituality
Are you passionately following Christ right now?
Do you expect God to work in your life and circumstances?
Do you know God’s will for your life? Are you following it?
Do you practice the spiritual disciplines because you want to, not because you feel obligated to? (Praying, reading your bible, participating in a small group, attending church).
Are you sharing your faith on a regular basis?
Are you open to the Holy Spirit’s leading?
Have you dealt with sin?

After answering these questions, rank your spiritual life on a scale of 1 to 10. Where are you? I wish I could say that my life has been a 10 for the past 20 years, but the truth is I ride the scale up and down as life happens. My guess is that you do to. I have a second question for you: Where do you want to be a six months from now? A year from now? And my final question is: What are you going to do in order to get there? The most significant characteristic of a godly leader is a godly life.

I reflected on these questions ranking myself. It became clear that I needed to make some changes because where I am now is not where I want to be a year from now. Lately I have felt discouraged. I have been working more and seeing fewer results. Our church finances have been depleted to the point that significant changes are looming. Every night this weighs on me to the point that it hurts. We have had challenges with our technology, challenges with communication, and challenges as a community. And our family has also had challenges from medical issues to finances to keeping everything rolling. All of these pressures and problems have taken a toll on my spiritual, physical, and emotional health. Something needs to change. Maybe you have similar feelings.

I want to encourage you to do what you need to do so you can fall in love with Jesus again. If you need a break from leading or serving right now in order to find your passion again, please do. Sometimes the best thing you can do is take time off to recharge yourself and your relationship with God.

In my experience, passionate spirituality comes when I experience the transforming presence and power of the Spirit. If I can see the Spirit at work in my life and ministry, I get excited about God. And things are beginning to change. Once again I have started to feel the presence of God and flourish while serving others.

One thing that I did was to sign a covenant with God. It reminds me that God is my first love and first priority.

​Will you join me in making a commitment to God to passionately pursue Him? If so, read the attachment, print it, sign it, and put it someplace where you will see it. 
commitment_for_passionate_spirituality.pdf
File Size: 264 kb
File Type: pdf
Download File
]]><![CDATA[The Friendliness Factor]]>Thu, 01 Oct 2015 21:02:49 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/the-friendliness-factorIs Freshwater a friendly church? My immediate thought is “of course it is.” But what if my immediate reaction is wrong? According to one source I read, 85% of church people think their church is friendly to new people, but according to new people who attended those churches 85% of them indicated that churches were unfriendly toward them. Why the disparity? There is a disparity because most people at church are friendly; they are just friendly with their friends. Since they have relationships in the church they have others to talk with, but guests who come do not have preexisting relationships, thus see the church from a different perspective. According to church consultant and pollster Tom Rainer most guests who thought a church was unfriendly never let anyone know. They simply left and never returned. This breaks my heart and stirred me to reexamine the friendliness of Freshwater. So when asked if we are a friendly church, my reply is “we can be.” Here are ten strategies how. Some of these strategies apply to everyone; some only pertains to church leaders. I think all of it is helpful to understand
1. Be intentional about being friendly. We value relationships, therefore we value friendliness. It is our desire that all regular attenders intentionally reach out to people they don’t know in order to greet them and welcome them. We do this by greeting others in gathering spaces and in the seats next to us.

2. Model warmth, humility, and friendliness. This is not a fabricated or phony friendliness, Jesus is our model and because he loved people, we should to. Genuinely care about people because people matter to God. Churches need to develop a culture of friendliness and they do that by being authentic and intentional. We need everyone to be “all in” when it comes to being friendly.

3. Recognize that authentic friendliness goes beyond the typical “hello.” We don’t take time in the service to “greet someone next to you” because it doesn’t give enough time to actually “greet someone next to you.” Take the time before or after the service to connect. This gives you more time to connect.

4. Understand that the first visit takes place online. Most people who come to Freshwater have already taken a tour online. Maybe they viewed a message, watched the intro video, or checked out the staff page. Almost everyone who steps through the doors has already checked us out online. We try our best to have a current, friendly web presence.

5. Have clear signage. We never assume everyone knows where everything is. I don’t know where everything is, so I can’t expect guests to know either. That is why we try to post clear signage to guide people to the right place. Nobody likes asking for help navigating the church, especially men.

6. Intentionally greet people at strategic locations. We have greeters in our parking lot at the St. Boni Campus, greeters at the front door and ushers at the sanctuary doors. We do this because we want to make sure everyone is greeted with a warm smile (and a handshake if the guest extends their hand). The parking attendants and the greeters are the first connections guests have so we want to make them count.

7. Have a visible and functional place to gather information. People who want more information about the church should not have to hunt for it, which is why we like to have friendly people serving at the Connections Center. They help guests connect with ministries and services.

8. Ensure the facility and grounds are neat and clean. Someone once said that if the church doesn’t care about their grounds and facility, then why would they care about someone’s soul? This is especially true of our kid’s areas. Parents hate dirty rooms and broken toys. We want to fix things that are broken and are constantly trying to make our facilities better. We also try to keep our facilities neat and clean because we want to send the right message.

9. Follow up after guests visit. We have a solid follow up plan to help connect with guests and get them information or answer questions. We follow up with kids, students, and adults because we care about people. When we follow up we also let them know that they can take the next step by attending the membership class to meet myself and other staff.

10. Provide opportunities to join a small group. Small groups are where relationships are established and grown. We want to have excellent small group leaders who care about people. We try and launch new groups all the time so that new people have a place to belong.
​
​Will you join me in welcoming new guests to Freshwater? Will you be intentional about greeting others who you know are new or others you have not yet met? By working together, we can make sure that Freshwater is a friendly church. Ultimately we want to be friendly because it will help people to connect with Christ and grow in their faith. Being friendly to others is part of being an authentic disciple of Christ.  
]]><![CDATA[How Do Churches Create Raving Fans?]]>Wed, 20 May 2015 13:40:42 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/how-do-churches-create-raving-fansI read the book “Raving Fans” by Ken Blanchard and Sheldon Bowles. The author states that people are so accustomed to poor service that when we are treated special we feel like royalty. Many churches struggle to provide adequate service let alone exceptional service with staff and volunteers. Blanchard suggests that companies [churches] ought to strive to make “raving fans,” customers who are absolutely thrilled with the experience they had while purchasing goods or services [or attending church]. Everybody knows that happy customers come back. Unhappy customers go elsewhere.
I think that churches have a lot to learn from Blanchard's approach to customer service. In his book he offers three insights to creating raving fans that you and I can use in our respective ministry positions.

If you want to create raving fans of your ministry you need to DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT. Do you want to have an adequate ministry or an exceptional one? Do you want people to have a neutral experience or a thrilling experience? What kind of ministry do you want to provide? Once you decide what kind of ministry you want to provide you can take the first action step to make it happen. In other words, get a clear vision for your ministry. Picture what your ministry could be like then figure out how to make it happen.  

The second secret to creating raving fans is this: DISCOVER WHAT THE GUEST WANTS. Do they expect you to provide top notch ministry? Or do they expect you to simply meet the minimum requirements? What kind of preconceived image does the guest have of your ministry? Search to find out exactly what the guest expects. 

The third secret to creating raving fans is: DISCOVER WHAT THE GUEST WANTS: PLUS ONE. This principle says that you need to consistently deliver a ministry experience that exceeds the guest’s expectations. For example: If people expect the sanctuary to be clean every week, we could exceed their expectations by offering them a spotless sanctuary after every service at both campuses week after week. If they expect one person to greet them as they walk through the front doors on the weekend, we could exceed their expectations by placing two people outside the front doors, another inside and even others by the sanctuary to greet them with a friendly smile and welcome. If they expect their kids not to like your kids ministry, work to exceed their expectations by giving their kids a phenomenal experience by using technology, relevant lessons, and by having an inviting, friendly environment. The same is true for Student Ministries or any other ministry.  

I want to challenge you to begin to dream big dreams about your ministry. Decide what you want your ministry to look like. What kind of vision do you have? Then discover what guests want and meet their expectations; plus one. Go the extra mile, take the extra time, do whatever it takes to create raving fans. Over time this creates momentum and raving fans that will be a megaphone for God’s glory.   

God calls each and every one of us to serve him with all of our hearts, minds, and actions. This is what it means to make disciples. He is not honored when we do His work half way. We want people to be raving fans of God. It brings glory to Him, and satisfaction to us.
]]><![CDATA[Courageous People]]>Thu, 13 Nov 2014 03:43:55 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/courageous-peopleA courageous person is someone who steps up to the challenge, someone who is willing to fight rather that retreat. Someone willing to step up, and intervene, because they want to be a catalyst for change. At Freshwater, our vision statement is a rally cry for our church family to “courageously share the life-changing love of Jesus Christ in a real, relevant, and relational manner.” I believe that this generation, our generation, is called to courageously live out our faith in such a way that it makes a difference in the community and among our peers. I want to challenge you courageously live out your faith in five ways. 
1. Courageously love others in Jesus name.

Believers are called to love others because Jesus loves us. We love others by listening, showing compassion, empathy, and helping even if we are not asked to. Think about what makes you feel loved by your friends and bless others in a similar way. Christianity is caught more than taught so when you love others you are reflecting Christ to them. Courageous people love others in Jesus name.   


2. Courageously invite others to join you at Freshwater.

Every membership class I ask people how they heard about Freshwater. Some people say they saw a road sign or found us on the web. But the vast majority said they came to Freshwater because they were invited! I challenge you to invite two people to church in the next two weeks. I am sure one or both of them will join you simply because you asked. It’s going to take courage, but God will lead you to the right person, you just have to be willing to extend the invitation. 


3. Courageously give to finance the vision.

Tithing is a biblical principle and it takes courage to do because it’s a matter of trust. Tithing is a way we say “thank you” to God. He gives us the whole pie and only asks us to share a single slice with him out of gratitude.  If you currently give nothing, give something. If you give something, start tithing. It’s not about equal giving, it’s about equal sacrifice. Tithing is a tangible demonstration of our faith that everyone is called to do. The best part is to see how much God blesses us in return for our faithfulness. I challenge you to tithe for three months and test God to see if you are not better off than you were before you started tithing. Doubt me? Read Malachi 3:10.    


4. Courageously serve to make a difference.

If you are a believer, you are the hands and feet of Christ and there is work to do. Jesus calls every member to minister is some way, shape, or form. If you are currently serving in a significant way, that’s awesome. If not, why not step up and serve? When we serve we are helping others to grow in their faith whether we greet them at the door and make them feel comfortable or lead a small group that challenges them to learn more about who God is. 

5. Courageously live out your faith.       

When we courageously live out our faith we are willing to follow the cross and not the crowd. We help when others are hurting, we step in when others step out, we care when others could care-less. We discipline with godly love and love like Christ. Following Christ is not easy, in fact it’s much harder than just following the crowd. That is why it takes courage to live out your faith.

Will you be courageous with your faith today? Will you make the decision right now to follow Christ and not the crowd? The Holy Spirit will give you the strength you need to follow Christ in all things and provide you with the joy that comes with it. Be courageous.  


]]><![CDATA[Why We Need To Be Equipped To Serve]]>Fri, 17 Oct 2014 01:27:53 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/october-16th-2014My first real job was bussing tables. It wasn’t a glamorous job and it didn’t pay much, but it was a job, and I needed money to buy a car so I took it. On my first day of work I didn’t clean any tables or stack any dishes, I sat in front of a T.V. and watched training videos. I learned proper hand washing techniques and company policy. After watching six hours of videos I was sent home and told to come back again the next day. On day two, I was given a name tag, a tour of the hotel, and shown where the employee lockers were. Then, the manager taught me the dress code, explained how to properly wear an apron, and walked me through the kitchen to familiarize me with their methods and standards. She taught me how to properly clear a table and sanitize it for the next guest. When she was done, she told me to come back the next day for more training. I thought all the training was crazy because all I was doing was busing tables and how hard could it be? 
I returned two days later, put my personal belongings in the locker, strapped on my apron, anticipating going to work. When I finished putting on my uniform, the manager looked at me, made a few adjustments to my apron, and then introduced me to the servers. She told the lead server to have me follow him around for the night to see what he did. All I did the entire night was shadow him, watch him interact with customers, and clear tables. On my fourth day of work, I finally bussed my first table. What I didn’t recognize or appreciate at the time, was the value of training. I thought all I was doing was clearing tables and bringing dirty dishes to the kitchen; but

At Freshwater we believe that you will enjoy serving more if you are equipped to do what you are called to do. That is why we have developed leadership streams for every ministry. A leadership stream is an intentional, systematic method of equipping you to do what you feel led to do. Over the course of the year each ministry stream is designed to equip you in the following ways:

  1. Make sure you know where to find the resources you need.
  2. Share who you need to go to when you have questions.
  3. Explain what is expected of you when you serve.
  4. Include you on the team so you feel supported and included.
  5. Give you the opportunity to voice concerns, provide new ideas, and present solutions.
  6. Provide the feedback you need to grow as a person, in your ministry role, and as a leader.
Even though I only worked as a busboy for a short period of time when I was sixteen, I still clear and sanitize my table at home the same way I was taught way back then. In the same way we are committed to equipping you, encouraging you, and empowering you so that you can feel confident that you are making a significant kingdom impact whether you serve at Freshwater for the next 20 years or someplace else.

If you are new to Freshwater and don’t currently serve in any way, I want to encourage you to take the next step in your faith and get involved. I’m not asking you to get involved because we have a huge volunteer shortage right now, because we don’t. I’m asking you to start serving because it will help you to go deeper in your faith and impact others in Jesus name. We will equip you, encourage you, and empower you to do what God is leading you to do. We do this because we are committed to making healthy disciples who in turn make more healthy disciples. This is our biblical mandate and present reality.
]]><![CDATA[Three Steps to Having a Better Personal Bible Study]]>Fri, 19 Sep 2014 01:44:40 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/three-steps-to-having-a-better-personal-bible-studyI am often asked: “How do I study the bible?” That’s a great question. There’s no doubt it’s is a big book and can seem overwhelming at first. Some people try to read through it from cover to cover, winding up feeling defeated by the time they get to the book of Numbers (the fourth book in the Old Testament). I believe that anyone can study the bible as long as they know how.

Precept Ministries is known for teaching what is known as the inductive method of Bible study to learn more about God and his written word. The inductive method of Bible study is a three step process that can open a new door of scriptural understanding and will challenge you to apply what you learn. If you have never studied the bible on your own, the inductive method is a great tool to do just that.

]]><![CDATA[Fans Followers Critics and Naysayers]]>Fri, 12 Sep 2014 01:47:50 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/fans-followers-critics-and-naysayersThis blog is for leaders. If you are in any type of a position of leadership, my thoughts will resonate with you. So, let me ask you this: Who are you listening to? Who is speaking into your life and are you listening to the right person or people?

Everyone has their fans, followers, critics, and naysayers. Your fans will cheer you on, and encourage you to go further and higher than you thought possible. Your followers will go with you, because they believe in you; they trust you, and know that you have their best interest in mind. Everyone has fans and followers, regardless if you are a domestic engineer or own your own business. Your fans and followers may include your spouse, children, parents, close friends, and maybe even your coworkers.

]]><![CDATA[Are You a Renter Or An Owner?]]>Fri, 08 Aug 2014 02:22:42 GMThttps://www.johnbraland.com/leaders/are-you-a-renter-or-an-ownerThere are significant differences between renters and owners. Take rental cars for example. I have driven dozens of rental cars and have never changed the oil in any of them; but the owner of Hertz or Budget does. They want the car to look nice and run right for the next renter. I have a rental property and none of my renters have ever replaced a furnace. They call me to take care of it. I paint the building and maintain the common areas. That is one of the reasons they rent, so they don’t have to take care of any of those maintenance issues. I own my own home and when the furnace goes in the fritz, I have to fix it because I’m an owner.
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